Health and Fitness

The bathroom lights flicker violently whenever someone slams a door. The cold water runs hot. The hot water runs hotter. Dial zero to reach the front desk. The phone is permanently disconnected. Would you rather be blind, or blinded? Look into the mirror and repeat after me.

The AI showed me an image of Garfield as a pope dissolving mid-blessing, and I whispered, “Too far,” but it was already drawing Sonic’s funeral.